Considered You a Living Miracle

I lit a cigarette and puffed in the air.

“Thanks for giving me advice,” I replied deliberately, “however, Henri, I simply can’t have a job right now, because I’ve conceived great ideas for my book and intended to force myself to start writing it next week. Writing a book is a gigantic task for me, and I want to concentrate only on my writing while I have time to do it. I have no ambition in my life whatsoever, except being a writer. I really don’t think I can do both – taking a job and writing a book – simultaneously. If I want to be a writer, I have no choice; I must spend all my time dedicating to a single task: writing. Also, I really want to change my life for the better.”

“I always admire your resolution for being a writer. Ramon always tells me that you have a talent, and everyone knows of your ability of writing. He also tells me that it’s just a matter of time, and once you get started writing a book, you’ll knock down a number of books. He has the unshakable faith in you as a writer and firmly believes you’ll make him proud of being your best friend. Shogo, you know, you have a great strength inside you, in your heart. You have an unflinching heart that is your great strength – that is why people always believe in you. Think about it, you haven’t written any single book for nine years, but your faith in yourself as a writer has never declined; it has somehow skyrocketed, day by day. How come? Nobody can do that, Shogo.”

Here he suddenly busted out laughing, with noticeable tears streaming down his face, “I am sorry, Shogo. Don’t feel offended by my laughter, but I simply can’t help it. When I think you haven’t done any single work as a writer, but you always tell me the same thing that you don’t have any time to waste because you have to write a book. But you don’t write anything, so I always wonder what Shogo is doing in the daytime? And you always come back to the apartment as dignified as Jesus Christ, as though you had fed a multitude of beggars at Mamita Beach. Sorry, I must stop it here.”

He wiped his tears with both of his hands and composed himself. And then he resumed, “What I’m trying to say is: Most people would have already given it up if they were in your shoes, including myself, because people simply can’t believe in themselves fully like you. But you optimistically believe in yourself without any fear. Even though you haven’t produced anything for your past efforts, you conscientiously believe you would start writing and become a writer someday. I consider you a living miracle.”

I lit a cigarette afresh. “Henri, what I know is only one thing: I want to be a writer – that’s all,” I said frankly, “I still don’t know how. However, each day I’m trying to improve myself, so that when the right moment comes, I can smash under the world’s chin with all my might to make myself known. It seems to everyone that I’m frittering away my time, because I don’t take a job, but I just walk on the streets leisurely and go to cafés to read books every single day – I look like I’m doing nothing to everyone’s eyes: a lazy bastard, but not to me. To be honest with you, I’ve constantly been writing a book in my head and constantly been trying to understand myself. I admit I haven’t written any books yet, but I’ve been developed by life itself, day by day.”

My Vacation Is Over

One day before Henri went back to Paris, I had a chance to have a heart-to-heart talk with him. It was around 8:00 p.m. when I came back to the apartment. He happened to be there alone and asked me to have a drink downstairs. Ramon’s apartment has a big garden with a pool every tenant is allowed to share. We went to the table under the turf roof, bringing some drinks and snacks. I was wondering where he wanted to go tonight for celebrating on his last day of Playa Del Carmen. I asked, “Henri, what is your plan for tonight?”

“No, Shogo, no, I’m not going anywhere, but just want to rest.”

I was perplexed with his reply because I expected the usual crazy night adventure tonight as usual. And inquired, “Don’t you want to go out tonight? Why on earth do you want to stay here? What the hell is wrong with you tonight?” 

He was laughing amiably and responded calmly, “My vacation is over, Shogo. Tomorrow I’m flying back to Paris. Yesterday was my last day of enjoyment. Now my sexual pilgrimage is over.”

“By the way, what happened last night after we left? Did you fuck those Italian girls?”

“No, I didn’t. But I fucked a Mexican girl.”

“So, your last mission was accomplished.”

“Ha-ha-ha, no, Shogo, not completely. Remember, I told you I’ve never slept with a Mayan, so my last mission in Playa Del Carmen was: get laid by a Mayan. I couldn’t do it, but I fucked a Mexican girl yesterday. As a result, my last mission was half accomplished. Well, Shogo, I enjoyed this vacation enormously and have no regrets.”

He fixed tequila with ice and suggested, “Shogo, why don’t you start finding a job here? I guess it is easy for you to find a job here because here has a lot of tourists, so naturally most people speak English. You don’t need to speak Spanish if you don’t want. As you know, Ramon wants you to stay at his apartment until you complete your book, and longer is better for him, I guess, ha-ha-ha. It might be good idea for you to take a part-time job in the morning, and you’ll have all your time in afternoon to write. You know, Patricia is starting to look for a job next week, so she can help you to find a job. I just thought so.”

He Is Crazy About Sex

I hesitated a bit, but finally brought up the main subject, “Ramon, I’ve been suspecting he is a sex maniac. He likes sex too much, I guess. He doesn’t care how much he’ll pay for getting laid, and it seems to me that he doesn’t care whether she is beautiful or not, but he just wants to have sex every day. It doesn’t matter where he goes, and even on a street – as soon as he sees a woman, he’ll rush to hail her to strike up a conversation in order to get laid, like a possessed. Please forgive me for talking in this fashion, but it seems to me that he is quite crazy about sex.”

He guffawed happily and replied delightfully, “Ha-ha-ha, fucking Shogo. Yap, you are on the right track, man. He is crazy about sex, for sure. Let me tell you some anecdotes. When we attended ITESO in Guadalajara, we had a big party at my friend’s house. Henri was there, of course. While we were having fun, he got bored and told me that he wanted to get laid. He said if he couldn’t persuade any girl to go to a hotel with him, he would go to a table dance alone. And then he just approached a girl whom his eyes happened to lay on and said to her directly that he wanted to fuck her tonight, so let’s get the hell out of here to enjoy the night. To my astonishment, she accepted his offer; they left the party, arm in arm. Of course, he fucked her all night, ha-ha-ha. Furthermore, the other incident was quite dangerous. Shogo, remember my house in Guadalajara? One day he came to my house, and some of my friends were there. Suddenly, my mother rushed towered me with hysterical voice, screamed at me, and begged me to come to the garden to stop them. I didn’t know exactly what was going on in the garden. Bitch, you won’t believe me, what a horror I saw in the garden. When I came to the garden with great anxiety, Henri was fucking my friend in the middle of garden! Can you beat it? Believe me, Shogo, he was fucking my friend in my garden and obviously didn’t care about my mother’s presence or anyone’s presence, because he was so immersed in fucking business, ha-ha-ha. I really think he is the craziest man I’ve ever met in my entire pimp life.”

You Are a Special Bitch

One day I talked to Ramon about him, “Henri is a bewildering guy. He is extremely generous and always insists to pay for everything for me whenever we hang around. I am wondering if he is rich, or if he is an extraordinarily generous and friendly person. You know, Ramon, I am just curious if he acts benevolently toward everybody.”

“Ha-ha-ha, bitch. Henri has a good job and earns five thousand Euros per month in Paris. Mexican pesos are nothing when comparing to Euros – that’s why he always spends money freely and goes to Chilly Willys to fuck whores. And on top of it all, this is his vacation; therefore, he wants to enjoy this time more than usual. Also, he likes you as a friend and admires your determination to be a writer. He always tells me, “I like Shogo’s way of life. I’ve met a bunch of Japanese in my life, and I don’t like them because they are so dull. Whenever I talk to Japanese, they make me bored to death. But take Shogo, he is different from them. He is full of life and enthusiasms. The first time I heard of his legend of a five-consecutive-nights orgy at the Men’s Club, I couldn’t believe he was a Japanese bird anyway. Sometimes I think he is insane, but he is a good person and surely has an amazing personality. He knows how to express his feelings candidly and how to enjoy life indefinitely, which differentiates him from the rest of Japanese. Now I understand why you are fond of him very much and why he is your best friend. I am getting fond of him, too.’ You see, bitch, he’s already decided – you are a special bitch. That’s why he is overgenerous to you, ha-ha-ha. He isn’t generous to everyone because if he doesn’t like someone, he even doesn’t talk to them, but just ignores them as if they didn’t exist. Crazy Henri, ha-ha-ha.”

Enjoy the Moment

As I say, Henri always insists on paying our expenses for our night adventures. We had constantly sailed on Fifth Avenue in the past seven nights, and to my great surprise, one day he invited us to an expensive French restaurant to eat a full French meal. Even in the day time, he invited me to Royal Carnival beach to relax with the sound of waves, good music, mighty sun, and good food, and he invited me to Coba to climb a great Mayan pyramid and to wheel around the pyramids and forest with a bicycle. I had a really good time and started enjoying his company. I think that French people knows how to enjoy the moment and live fully.

Jean, who is French, was like that, too; I had had a great time with him in Cancun two years ago. One day he told me at a night club, “Shogo, I like to have a conversation with girls and dance with them, and I don’t care if they ignore me or not, because my intention is not getting laid; my intention is to enjoy the moment to the most and get to know new women whenever opportunities arise. Each one of them has their own uniqueness, which I’ve found out, and every time I talk to them about anything under the sun – even trivial things – I will learn something from them. That is my philosophy, Shogo.”

As I got to know of Henri better, I was beginning to know of his other side. We had been in Chilly Willys twice the past five days because of his passion. He wanted to get laid every day, that he confessed me. Henri doesn’t care if he pays five thousand pesos for a whore in order to get laid. Wherever we go, his attitude does not change. As soon as he sees a beautiful woman, or it does not matter if she is beautiful or not, he tries to have a conversation with her in order to get laid. It does not matter either if he pays or not, since his only goal is: have sex. Because of that fact, he has constantly gotten laid the past fifteen days without any rest.