It was my early twentieth year when I worked six days a week like a slave to save money to knock about the world. I was considering attending a language school to learn English in Calgary, Canada. Why did I choose Canada instead of America? The answer was pretty simple, money. In the year 2001, the US dollar was far more expensive than the Japanese yen; the Canadian dollar was much cheaper than the Japanese yen. That was why I chose Canada for my first adventure to be able to stay longer in a foreign land. I chose a school in Calgary and organized everything for my first appearance in the world. Needless to say, I was over the moon, of course.
Truth be told, I was a little anxious to leap into the unknown. Two weeks before my departure for my first odyssey, I attended the Canadian school fair in Shibuya, Tokyo, which changed my life forever. I visited the booth of ILSC (International Language School of Canada), where I met Takako Devis – she would become my friend later and talk to me only in English so that I could improve my English faster. She explained to me that ILSC had only a few Japanese students but many foreign students. Hence, there would be a great environment for me to learn English as a beginner. Also, the school policy said that students must speak only English in school.
Moreover, the school has a lot of school activities, so I could make friends easily and learn about different cultures as well. While she was selling the advantage of attending ILSC to me, I felt that this was what I had been looking for my entire life. Some uncanny things must have happened to me that day since, in less than twenty minutes, I had decided to change my entire plan: I had decided to sign up with ILSC and change the location of my first abroad scene from Calgary to Vancouver.
My first month in Canada had elapsed quickly, like a flash. I was a wee bit nervous and did not want to be alone, so I made some Japanese friends. It was very difficult for me to speak English. As a matter of fact, I was unable to speak English due to a lack of knowledge, experience, study, practice, etc. However, I thought that if I really wanted to speak English, I must stop speaking Japanese; I must start speaking English only. I thought that if I did not waste my money and time, I had better stop making Japanese friends and start making foreign friends only. And if I wanted this experience to be something worthwhile, I had better change my attitude toward life, namely, dropping the Japanese way of life and starting to welcome a new way of life. Ergo, I made up my mind to remodel myself, and this decision changed my life forever.
As soon as I made up my mind, I started talking to many foreign students, and to my astonishment, I made three German friends on my first attempt. This was the beginning of new classes, so I went to Seymour Campus to check my new classes’ campuses, where I met German friends. Both of my new morning and afternoon classes were held at Hastings Campus. When my afternoon class was dismissed, I went downstairs to smoke a cigarette and relax. As I was enjoying smoking on the street, a beautiful blond girl was also smoking a cigarette next to a trash can. As soon as my eyes rested on her, my heart began throbbing faster, and I almost jumped out of my skin because of her unearthly beauty. I talked to myself encouragingly, “Why don’t you talk to her, Shogo? You said that you wanted to make foreign friends, so why don’t you talk to her as a friend? Here is another chance, man – just do it!” Thence, I decided to talk to her and walked toward the trash can to strike up a conversation with her.
When reaching the trash can and looking at her eyes, I was quite intimidated and could not utter anything. Ashamedly, I turned back and was about to leave, but something made me stop – I felt that she was staring at my back. I stopped and turned back to look at her; yes, she was indeed staring at me. Hence, I summoned my whole courage up and did the most difficult thing on this earth: Say hello to the most beautiful girl walking on two legs under the sun to start a conversation. To my great joy, she said hello back to me with a smile. Then, I asked if she was studying at ILSC, and she said that she had been studying at ILSC for three months. It was a sheer magical moment, for I told her about things, which I had not told anyone yet, and we talked about things for over thirty minutes without introducing ourselves to each other.
At last, she realized that she did not know my name, so she asked my name. I told her my name and asked her name as well. She told me about her name, but I could not pronounce her name correctly, so she told me about her name again, laughing. I was embarrassed due to my poor English, but I was so happy. Finally, we exchanged goodbyes and promised to see each other again soon.
“What a magical day,” I thought to myself euphorically. “It was a miracle! I just decided to speak only English this morning, and to my astonishment, I’ve already made three German friends! And most importantly, I’ve just met the most beautiful girl I have ever seen in my entire life – she has become my friend! If this is not a miracle, I don’t understand anything!” I talked to myself excitedly. I just met my first love, and her name is Carolina. Twenty-three summers were behind her. I was overjoyed and skipped to Vancouver Public Library to study English with a happy smile on my lips.
The following day, I was drinking coffee outside Blenz Coffee on Granville and Nelson Street before the morning class. And suddenly, a beautiful girl appeared as large as life and, waving her right hand – said to me, “Hello, my friend!” It was Carolina. Then, she asked, “May I sit together.” I replied delightfully, “Yes, of course.” Then, she sat down and told me that she had made a business card on which was written her telephone number and address both in Canada and Brazil, and she wanted me to have it. From that moment on, I always waited at the Blenz Coffee before the morning class to see her and smoke cigarettes together.
The morning class was from 9:00 a.m. to 12:00 p.m., and we had the same break time at 10:30 a.m. I always went down the stairs to smoke at break time, and she was always there. Waiting for her in front of Blenz Coffee in the morning and waiting for her in front of Hastings Campus during the break time had become the happiest hours of my days.
One day, I went down the stairs to see Carolina at break time, but she was not there. I dejectedly lighted a cigarette and began smoking it alone. I was anxiously waiting for her to show up, but there was no sign of her. I was so disappointed and felt sad. As I was climbing the stairs up to the classroom with a heavy heart, she was coming down with her friends. As soon as she saw me, she asked me if I finished smoking, and I said, “Yes.” She grabbed my right arm and said, “Let’s smoke again, come with me.” Then, she told her friends that she could not go with them because she wanted to talk with me. And we went down the stairs to smoke and had a wonderful time. Her action made my heart melt, and I was so in love with her. It was a sheer magical moment for me since no Japanese woman ever showed me such a beautiful gesture.
The other essential aspect here was that I met Gerardo on the same day as I met Clarissa. I did not know that moment that Gerald would become one of my lifelong friends and would lead me to meet another lifelong friend, Jorgito and Matador – and would invite me to visit Mexico, where I could change my entire concept of life for good. Anyway, returning to the story – Gerardo and I become friends instantly. And one day, as I was smoking with Carolina in front of Hastings Campus, Gerardo was also coming outside to smoke. As soon as he saw me smoking, he was approaching to join us. Thence, I introduced her to him, and to my great joy, they became friends from that day on.
I was head over heels in love with Carolina, but it was hard for me to believe that such a beautiful girl fell for me. I barely spoke English at that moment; on the contrary, she could speak good English. So apparently, it was difficult for her to communicate with me, and it required enormous patience for her to talk with me due to my poor English skills. However, she always chose to be with me and spend quality time with me. As I said, she was so beautiful, so naturally, numerous guys wanted to talk with her, but she always talked only with me, whose reason I could not fathom. For example, a Korean dude, who was my classmate, approached me while I was talking to Carolina in front of Hastings Campus – he asked me if she was my friend; I just nodded. And then he asked her age, but she did not respond to him; she told her age to me and asked about my age. And he asked her where she lived, but again she did not respond; she told me where she lived and asked where I lived.
It was hard for me to grasp the reality, and I could still not believe that I had a chance to ask her out. So, I always asked Gerardo, who has become my wingman, to help me to find Ms. Right in the future: If I had the slightest chance to ask her out and she would say “Yes.” He would always encourage me to go for it. Even though I trusted Gerardo (He would become a master of girls later) and valued his opinions, I felt that I needed to have a female point of view on boots. Hence, I became friends with two Japanese girls to ask for their opinions and advice. Of course, I pleaded not to speak Japanese to improve my English faster, but this was an emergency: Love could not wait. I needed to communicate how I felt accurately, and my English skill was not enough to communicate such a delicate matter; therefore, I let myself speak Japanese as a temporary remedy.
It was the middle of summer. My Japanese friends, ex-ILSC students who were moving to Whistler to take a part-time job to enjoy snowboarding, came back to Vancouver for a sojourn. They asked me if I wanted to join them to embark on a road trip to the Rocky Mountains, and I decided to go with them right away since I had never been there. Moreover, I heard the praises of the Rocky Mountains countless times that they were extremely beautiful and magical places to visit. It would be four days road trip, so I was anxious not to be able to see Carolina for the next several days; that was sheer torture for me. Even so, I told her about it, and to my great astonishment, she wished me to have a wonderful time there.
It was the day of departure for the Rocky Mountains. I was so excited about the road trip; on the other hand, I was anxious not to see Carolina for the next several days. Kaori and Miki came to see me and wished me a safe trip. And they told me they talked about my trip with Clarissa, who said she would be sad and miss me. When I heard this, I regretted my decision to have the road trip, but a part of me was glad to hear that she would miss me, which meant that she was thinking of me.
We indeed had a great time there, so we decided to take two more days to keep on driving around the Rocky Mountains. We went to Canmore, Banff, Lake Louise, Jasper, and so on and so forth. My heart was constantly crying for Carolina, but I was willing to sacrifice my love for her to experience the Rocky Mountains’ breathtaking landscapes. It was a sheer magical experience to travel around the Rocky Mountains, whose beauty I instantly fell in love with. When I went to Jasper, I bought a zippo for her as a souvenir. My heart was so delighted by the prospect of seeing my loved one and giving my heartfelt gift to her soon.
We came back to Vancouver around midnight. I was unimaginably fatigued and felt so sick. However, it never crossed my mind to skip school tomorrow due to my loved one. Even though I was dog-tired, had fever, nausea, and headache, and even though I risked my life and health for the sake of true love – I needed to see her. I must go to school tomorrow to see Carolina and give the absolute gift to her.
It was around 9:00 a.m. when I woke up the following morning. I felt dead-tired, nauseated, horrible, dizzy, weak, wobbly, and so on. But this was extremely important for me to get up to see my true love. I got up with superhuman strength, took a bus from North Vancouver, and got off at Hastings Street. “Nothing could prevent me from seeing my loved one today, even death! Even if Zeus strikes me with a thunderbolt, I would grab it and strike it back to him, amen!” I yelled at the top of my lungs to the blue heaven and nodded with determination. Such was my conviction.
It was around 10:30 a.m. and time for her to have a break time. As I was walking on Hastings Street heading to the Hastings Campus, Carolina was eating chips on the sidewalk of Hastings Street. As soon as my eyes spotted her, my heart started beating faster and faster, and I was so delighted and nervous at the same time.
I approached her and called her name, but she just stared at me and looked the other way. I did not understand why she was acting in this strange fashion, so I tried to say hello to her again, but she did not say anything and kept looking the other way. Thence, I asked her if something bad had happened to her while I was away – She just uttered incomprehensible things, such as, “I went to Lion’s Bridge and jumped from it.” And she looked the other way again. I didn’t understand what she was talking about, and I was perplexed. I persistently tried to talk with her again, but she refused to speak and kept looking the other way.
I thought, “Why is she still standing on the street with me if she doesn’t want to talk to me? What have I done to her? Has she met someone special while I was away? If she doesn’t want me to be around, I had better accept the fact with dignity, although I feel extremely sad and devastated.” Indeed, I couldn’t do anything if she didn’t want to talk with me – I simply said, “I’m going to smoke over there, so see you around.”
With that, I started walking toward Hastings Campus disappointedly and started smoking right in front of Hasting Campus gloomily.
To my great astonishment, she followed me to Hastings Campus and stopped right beside me, staring at me. And then, she began smoking right beside me. I looked at her and tried to utter something, but she started looking the other way again. I thought that it was irrevocably over; actually, it never even started. I just fantasized about the whole thing and got fancy ideas in my head: She was never interested in me. However, how hard the cold reality crashed my spirit, I had better give her the absolute gift from Jasper because I bought it specifically for her. I bought the zippo for her – because when I met her the very first time, she was smoking a cigarette and asked what my cigarette’s brand was; because we always smoked a cigarette together in the morning, in the break time, and after school; Smoking with her was the happiest time of my day because I had only one idea since I woke up every morning: smoking a cigarette with her. This was because….
I took the zippo from my knapsack, handed it to her, and just said, “I bought it in Jasper – it’s for you.”
She looked at it, toyed with it on her hands, and gave it back to me by saying, “It’s very nice. Thank you for showing it to me.”
I was quite surprised by her reaction. “Maybe my English was not good, so she did not understand that it was for her,” I thought. Therefore, I said to her very slowly, “THIS IS FOR YOU, CAROLINA. I BOUGHT IT ESPECIALLY FOR YOU AS A SOUVENIR. I HAVE ALWAYS THOUGHT OF YOU.”
With that, I handed it to her again.
She became cheerful instantly and began talking happily, “Is this for me? Really? As a matter of fact, I’ve been considering buying a zippo for a couple of months, but you gave me, thank you very much, Shogo!”
Pause.
She was jumping up and down from sheer joy and continued, “I really love this, Shogo! I would never dream of you bringing me a souvenir. I really appreciate it! By the way, are you okay, Shogo? You look so weak and exhausted.”
I replied in a weak voice, “I got a terrible headache, fever, and cold. Actually, it is so hard for me to be merely standing here.”
“Oh, Shogo, you better take care of yourself. I have a pill for the symptom like you have right now. Do you want to try it?”
“Yes, I would love to take it. To be earnest, I am almost collapsing.”
It was about time to resume the class, so we climbed up the stairs. She gave me a couple of pills and said, “Here they are. Take two pills with water. They’ll help to relieve your fever, cold, and headache. I hope you get well pretty soon. Have a rest and good sleep after school. And many thanks for the gift, Shogo!” She disappeared into her classroom, waving her right hand to me, smiling.
My love for Carolina was growing day by day. One day I asked her to eat lunch together the following day; she accepted my invitation forthwith. I was so excited about the prospect of spending time with her other than smoking cigarettes.
Here came the lovely day – I was so elated from the morning and eagerly waiting for the time to elapse quickly. As soon as the morning class was finished, I fanatically bolted to Hastings Campus to see Carolina. As I skipped the stairs up three stairs at a time and searched for my angel in a lounge room, she was talking with two Brazilian guys. When I saw her talking with them, a misconception was born in my mind immediately. I thought, “Why is she being with Brazilian gorillas? Does she completely forget our rendezvous? I am stupid enough to believe that she would be having lunch with me!”
Thence, I darted out of the lounge room and ran down the stairs like a madman. As soon as I hit the street, I began smoking like an angry ogre. I started debating aloud whether I should go upstairs to challenge a duel to Brazilian gorillas or just let it go – have lunch with myself. Obviously, I could not let it go, for my love for Carolina was ardent and fervent. My love for her was genuine. In short, I yelled at the blue heaven at the top of my voice, “CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!”
As I went up to the second floor, the Brazilian guys approached me and asked if I was Shogo. I just nodded. And then they said angrily why I was late, as Carolina was waiting for me and looking forward to having lunch with me. I apologized to them for being late and told them that I was looking forward to having lunch with her all day, too. They introduced themselves to me and said, “Please take great care of her. She really likes you very much!”
With that, they offered me handshakes. I was overjoyed and felt over the moon. I strode to Carolina and apologized to her for being late ceremoniously.
She said, “It’s okay, it’s really okay, Shogo. So, don’t worry. I was just talking to my friends about you. I’m starving, you know….”
“Why don’t we go to Blenz Coffee and eat lunch outside?”
“It is a good idea, Shogo. Today is a beautiful day with sunshine. I love the idea.”
“Let’s go then.”
While we were enjoying lunch outside of Blenz Coffee under the bright sun, she abruptly asked me with much curiosity, “Why do you always carry around books in your knapsack?”
I replied embarrassingly, “I love reading books and simply want to improve my English. It’s very hard for me to read English books though, you know….”
“Why Shogo? Try to read them. I think your English is not bad as you think.”
“Thanks for encouraging me all the time, Clarissa. I’ll try to understand them harder since I really love reading English books.”
“Yes, you should never stop trying it if you love reading books so much. I think you should be a writer, Shogo. I really mean it.”
Her innocent remark gave me enough food in my noodle to ponder the possibility of seriously becoming a writer for the very first time in my life. I really loved reading books and truly wanted to be a writer; however, I did not have enough courage to try it and did not have enough confidence to imagine myself becoming one someday. She was the first person to embolden me to be a writer and believe I could become a writer someday. Her innocent remark has stayed in my deepest heart for a long time, and her remark would push me to begin pursuing my destiny eventually.
At last, I had enough courage to ask her out. I invited her to have dinner with me, and she said, “YES.” I was so pleased to go out with her and felt that I was the happiest man on this planet.
It was a Wednesday and my date with Carolina was at 6:00 p.m. I was so excited throughout the whole day from the morning. As soon as the class was finished, I began scouting fancy Japanese restaurants downtown. She told me that she loved Japanese food and wanted to have dinner at a Japanese restaurant. Therefore, I scouted around the downtown and visited every Japanese restaurant in the vicinity of the great Vancouver downtown area. After searching for a fancy Japanese restaurant on foot, I finally decided to take her to Shizen Ya.
I wanted Clarissa to taste all kinds of Japanese food, so I ordered CHICKEN GYOZA, NIGIRI SUSHI, FRESH CRAB CALIFORNIA ROLL, SALMON ROLL, VEGETABLE MISO SOUP, VEGETABLE SUNOMONO, SPICY AGEDASHI TOFU, ASSORTED SASHIMI, CHIRASHI DON, BEEF UDON SOUP, SHIZENYA BEANS CURRY, and TIGER PRAWN TEMPURA.
When the dishes were delivered, she was surprised and said, “It’s too much, Shogo. Why are you ordering so many foods?”
“I just want you to enjoy every kind of Japanese food.”
“It’s a mouthful, really, it’s a mouthful, Shogo, but thanks!”
Of course, we could not eat the whole food, but we enjoyed the food anyway. She told me that she was having a great time, she loved food, and she liked being with me. I was so happy to hear about it, and my heart was touched.
It was time for her to go back to her apartment because she had an appointment with her landowner. As I was about to pay the bill, she said, “Shogo, I’ll pay for my share.”
“No, Carolina. Let me pay the whole bill.”
“It’s not fair, Shogo. I’m sincerely enjoying having dinner with you, and you ordered many things. So, I want to pay for my share.”
“I can’t accept it since I invited you. I indeed ordered too many, more than necessary, you know…. So, I want to pay the whole bill. You can pay next time, Carolina. How’s that?”
“Fair enough. I’ll pay next time, Shogo. I really had a wonderful time. Thank you so much!”
While we were walking to the bus station, I could not resist showing her my appreciation for being with my company all the time. I said with tears in my eyes, “Thank you for talking to me all the time, Carolina. Thank you for having dinner with me tonight. I don’t know why you always talk to me and choose to be with my company instead of others. I know my English is not so good, so it’s hard for you to be with my company. Anyway, it doesn’t matter; I’m truly happy today. I really appreciate your friendship. Thank you for having dinner with me tonight, Carolina!”
She looked into my eyes with her beautiful blue eyes and said, “All pleasure is mine, Shogo. You’re very special to me. I always have a great time with you. I really love being with you; I truly mean it. Anyway, it’s time for me to go home. Many thanks for taking me to the wonderful Japanese restaurant tonight, Shogo. I really have a fantastic time. See you tomorrow, bye!”
After she was gone, I felt a little embarrassed for my emotional outburst. But as a matter of fact, I was not worried about it because I knew from the heart that I was a lucky man to have dinner with such a wonderful woman. I started wandering on the street under the autumn stars with pure joy, constantly humming in happy tune and constantly thanking for being born under the lucky stars, with grateful tears in my eyes.
