Are you a fucking asshole? I did not know that you will be arriving this Friday, man! You should have told me about it before, idiot. Jorge and I are traveling to Guadalajara on this weekend, so nobody will pick you up at the airport. I am sorry, my friend, but do not worry, we will see you on the coming Monday. Please find a hotel to stay at. Sorry for the unexpected inconvenience, my friend. Ha-ha-ha, I am kidding, of course, I will pick you up at the airport, son of bitch! Also, you should know that you will be a Mexican citizen; therefore, you have to learn how things are going on in Mexico and have to learn basic Spanish. Don’t be pussy, idiot, you do not need to attend a school to learn Spanish; you have to learn it by yourself, man, ha-ha-ha….
Son of bitch, again, I have to pick you up at the airport, ha-ha-ha. Don’t worry, I will be there, but be sure to sleep well on the plane because we will have the busy weekend. On Friday night, we will go out with my beautiful roommate, so that you can know about her and vice-versa, she asked me that. And then on the Saturday morning at six, we will go to the bullfighting place to buy some tickets for the Sunday event and perhaps take nap a little bit. You can stay at my apartment to take a rest, but we will go to a shopping mall to look for a mattress or something like that because you cannot sleep with me on the same bed all the time! Are you fucking gay, idiot, ha-ha-ha…? I just have a single bed.
By the way, you should go to Excess to see your Czech sweetheart, man! She will be so happy if you show your presence. I talked with her two months ago. She told me that she misses you so much and wants to see you again. And she sent you a million kisses, ha-ha-ha. She loves you very much, you lucky bastard! She is so beautiful and funny. We can go there to see her next week, so don’t worry!
I think that is all. See you on the Friday night and bring some Japanese stuff, man. Oh, I forgot to tell you that I want to go to Cancun and Playa Del Carmen with you, so please ask Ramon if I can stay at his apartment as well; otherwise, I will spend more money, and I do not have it. See you very soon, my friend!