I will Be an Eternal Bitch Forever

Here he coughed violently because of the cigarette and threw it away disgustedly.

“Shit! Goddamn cigarette! I was almost asphyxiated anyway,” he carried on, “my point is that marriage is a ticket of express directly to hell. By the way, I’m planning to invade California next spring to find cute cunts to get laid. I always want to fuck American cunts to my heart’s content. Actually, I’ll have nothing to do there, but I have a cousin over there, so I can stay at his house free. I’m going to use this opportunity to get to know of American cunts, as many as my erection allows, ha-ha-ha….”

He was suddenly standing up and looking toward heaven with moist eyes. And then he made the most preposterous oath aloud with making a sign of cross over him that any human being has ever performed yet: “I swear the name of Holy Ghost, I will never marry anyone, and I will be an eternal bitch forever, amen!”

Here I let myself burst out laughing, because he made this ludicrous oath with serious face and with a touch of emotion. And I said, “Please forgive me for laughing hysterically. Anyway, are you serious? I think you drank too much tonight.”

“Ha-ha-ha, bitch, I am fucking sober and am completely in my right mind. I just want to get it off my chest once in a while, and I knew you would perfectly understand my nature. I guess that tonight I might be a bit sentimental son of bitch, but I just want to be an eternal bitch to fuck beautiful cunts around the world for the rest of my life. That’s all, man!”

Need to Confess Something Important

I still cannot believe that he has been married. I thought he was the kind of guy who would never marry in his lifetime; he would just enjoy drinking beer every day and would enjoy having a good fuck occasionally, to the end of his day. I remember vividly that he swore his eternal bachelorhood eight years ago. We were invited to the wedding party of our friend’s sister. As usual, he was drunk and was enjoying it the most. Suddenly he said to me, “Hey bitch, I need to confess something important. Let’s go outside.” And we went to the empty soccer field by the wedding hall. We were looking at the empty field sitting on a stool and talking about our past adventures. He asked me, “Bitch, give me a cigarette!”

I replied with a surprise, “Of course, Ramon, but you don’t smoke cigarette, and you don’t like it. Are you sure that you want to smoke?”

He was laughing nonchalantly and was looking at my eyes determinedly as though he were a Trojan who indulges in the last luxurious treat before going to the battle for believing in the cause: “Bitch, let me smoke a cigarette only tonight. I need to smoke it before confessing something about my nature.”

He lit it and started his monologue, “You know, bitch, I think marriage is the worst invention that human beings have conceived of in history. I can’t imagine myself that I’ll compromise to fuck only one woman for the rest of my life someday. You know, I want to fuck every single beautiful woman I lay my eyes on. I can’t shake off cunts from my mind, you know. I really think my dick does not belong to only single cunt, but it belongs to all beautiful cunts who are dying to open legs for me. Of course, you know, I’ve fucked many cunts in my life, and you’ve witnessed how I wielded my winnow over cunts in Vancouver. I fucked Miki and Kaori, ha-ha-ha…. Besides them I fucked Canadian cunt, German cunt, and I don’t remember how many cunts I fucked over there –”

As If It Were Yesterday

I was wondering whether he was kidding or he was becoming mawkish again. And without any serious consideration about his proposal, I read Ramon’s message. He always calls me bitch, I do not know why. He never writes, “dear friend,” but always start with “biaatch”. I guess that it might be his way to show his affection toward me as a friend. Thus, I have accepted it without any protesting. Here is how it began, without any usual greetings:


Hey Biaatch…!!!

I am so fucking alive like a fucking crazy nymphomaniac, man, ha-ha-ha! First of all, let me apologize for not contacting with you for a long time, since I have traveled around fucking Mexico due to my job. But I know that it is a lame excuse for not writing to one of my best fucking friends. About the job, everything is fine, except the fucking routine every day with a lot of monotonous activities. Guess what, biaatch? Patricia and I are seriously planning to visit Vancouver next summer. We want to ask you to meet us there next summer if you agree with the date. It will be fucking exciting to see you there again. I always remember the old time when I was a fucking honey single bitch with huge erection twenty-four hours a day like you, ha-ha-ha…!  We must meet next summer in Vancouver, biatch. Of course, I prefer meeting you before next summer, but I guess that it is kind of hard for you to manage because of your circumstances and fucking economy. However, if there is the possibility for us to see each other again before next summer, it will be awesome, biatch! I truly miss old time in Vancouver with you a lot, man! Life has passed so fast with a great deal of changes every single day that is hard to believe. We met in Vancouver nine years ago, goddamn; it was a long, long time ago. I remember it as if it were yesterday, ha-ha-ha!

I easily guess that you must be so fucking stressed out with your life in Japan, man. Believe me that staying in Japan is bad for you, especially your health. Your health is the principal thing, so you must take care of it, really, man…. Why don’t you come to Mexico to live with us for a while where the fucking life is cheaper, easier, and healthier. Also, it is cheaper to travel to Vancouver, cost is just US $400 for round trips from Cancun, can you imagine? It is cheaper for us to visit Vancouver from here than from fucking Guadalajara! You know that you are my Nippon brother, and you can stay at my apartment with us all the time you need to complete your dreams of being a writer and dreams of living in Vancouver again. Let me know what you think about this wonderful idea? Or do you have another plan for this coming winter?

About my sexual nature, you know me more than my fucking parents or Patricia, man, ha-ha-ha. As you know, every fucking block in Playa Del Carmen or every place and every street around the planet, I always get huge erection in my pants when I see blond cunts passing before me, ha-ha-ha! That something I cannot control because it is in my nature, ha-ha-ha…. I hope to hear from you soon, my friend.

Big hugs from your pimp master!

I Feel Something Missing

My fateful day came. I think that it was the thirtieth of October. I had received the important messages from my Mexican friends. I do not think that it was pure coincidence. I truly believe that the angels of heaven could not watch my sufferings any more up there, and finally, they decided to send my guardian angels to rescue me from my helpless tribulations. Escape from Japan had become my top priority since the day of my resolution, and I still did not have any idea then.

I woke up with repugnance to realize that I was still in Japan and took a shower to ready to march on the streets to cheer myself up. It is my habit to check my e-mail inbox with hope to receive good news before sailing out. My eyes were captured: Mission in Mexico on Christmas.

It was from my good friend Jorgito, and it said: “I have been doing very well, my friend, but I feel something missing. I have started my own business, and I do not have any complaints right now, but still something missing. I realized that it is you, Shogo. I have been thinking that Shogo is my good friend, and he is a good person. Why is he living in Japan, which is very far away from here? I thought that he has to stay with us to enjoy life together. In conclusion, I have conceived of a great idea. Shogo, why don’t you come to Mexico to stay with us for a while? I will look for a job for you if you need some money. The main thing is that we can enjoy our lives together. I have been thinking that you have good friends in Mexico: Gerardo, Ramon, and me. Also, you have many Mexican friends here. I am wondering if you have any good friends in Japan. You should stay away from Japan. As you know, my house is yours, so you do not worry about anything. I want you to come to Mexico. Of course, I miss you so much; however, the main reason is that I want you to write your book without worrying about anything. Think about my proposal seriously, my brother. I really wish that you will decide to come to Mexico in order to start writing your book!”

Solo Performance is My Virtue!

One thing is transparent: Even if I am not able to write anything in the next ten years, I refuse to give it up because I know from the bottom of heart: I am in love with writing. No women ever give me pleasure like the first time I laid my eyes on Mysteries. After every intense session with Hamsun, Miller, Hesse, or Dostoevsky, I cannot control my intoxication, I feel so alive, and I take a long walk in order to cool down my excitement. It is a wonderful time that I have passionately read their books to be instructed and educated; I have studied them assiduously even line by line in order to figure out the magic of their writing; I have searched in them so that I can understand the meaning of life. I want to write like them, which is constantly in my mind. Even if I am not able to write like them, I know that I have something to say to the world. I have borne beautiful music inside me. Even if it takes me more ten years to express myself and even if nobody cares about my work, I must express myself. I do not care for anything anymore. If people say that I am bizarre because I hate my own country, I will just shrug my shoulders as if I defiantly said, “So what?” I am uncivilized and do not belong to any organizations. I belong to myself and work for myself: Solo performance is my virtue! I treasure my individuality to the heavens. I know that this is the right thing to pursue and know that I am right because my heart tells me so. I refuse to be finished until I sing my own song. I still have not had the slightest idea how to escape from my helpless tribulations, but let me sing my own song one more time: the last desperate effort!”