One thing is transparent: Even if I am not able to write anything in the next ten years, I refuse to give it up because I know from the bottom of heart: I am in love with writing. No women ever give me pleasure like the first time I laid my eyes on Mysteries. After every intense session with Hamsun, Miller, Hesse, or Dostoevsky, I cannot control my intoxication, I feel so alive, and I take a long walk in order to cool down my excitement. It is a wonderful time that I have passionately read their books to be instructed and educated; I have studied them assiduously even line by line in order to figure out the magic of their writing; I have searched in them so that I can understand the meaning of life. I want to write like them, which is constantly in my mind. Even if I am not able to write like them, I know that I have something to say to the world. I have borne beautiful music inside me. Even if it takes me more ten years to express myself and even if nobody cares about my work, I must express myself. I do not care for anything anymore. If people say that I am bizarre because I hate my own country, I will just shrug my shoulders as if I defiantly said, “So what?” I am uncivilized and do not belong to any organizations. I belong to myself and work for myself: Solo performance is my virtue! I treasure my individuality to the heavens. I know that this is the right thing to pursue and know that I am right because my heart tells me so. I refuse to be finished until I sing my own song. I still have not had the slightest idea how to escape from my helpless tribulations, but let me sing my own song one more time: the last desperate effort!”
He was patting my back, smiling, “You don’t need to thank me, bitch. It’s my duty as a best friend to take care of you till you’re recognized. Don’t worry about anything. If you can’t have a success as a writer, you can be a porn star anytime, ha-ha-ha…. All joking aside, I know you’re a brave human being, and your courage will keep you on flying higher and higher on this life – I have no doubt for it. By the way, let me reveal you how I know of this editor cunt. Once upon a time in Puerto Vallarta with a sound of gentle wave, I fucked her, ha-ha-ha…. Please don’t tell Patricia about it; just tell her that she is my friend, ha-ha-ha….”
I was bursting out laughing and remarked, “I know you, my friend. You’re just incredible.”
He guffawed gleefully and carried on enthusiastically, “Bitch, I’m thinking that I’ll drop you off at Starbucks on Fifth Avenue, and you should wait for me there, because I have an appointment with a massage therapist. I don’t know why, but I got acute pain on my right shoulder. It’s hard for me to lift my right shoulder right now. I don’t remember how it happened. I’ve been suffering from the pain for a month now. I really think a stress is the cause of pain. Every time I get frustrated, the pain will increase. I’ve gotten too much stress these days, you know…. Anyway, my session will take about two hours, so it’ll be a good idea for you to stroll around Fifth Avenue to watch beautiful cunts passing-by and wait for me at Starbucks.”
“Sounds good to me,” I nodded affirmatively. “I hope your pain will be gone soon.”
“Thanks, bitch. I hope so, too. Over and above, please don’t tell Patricia about a massage session, since she despises it.”
“How come?” I was muddled.
He started divulging with guffaw, “Shogo, you can’t imagine how hot my therapist is. Oh, man, she is fucking hot and sexy. She is from Jamaica. Just looking at her makes my mouth water, so to speak. The point is that Patricia knows she is gorgeous; that’s why she doesn’t approve me for going to the massage. However, I really need to alleviate the fucking pain, you know. Besides, Jamaican cunt is goddamn professional. From the beginning, she’s warned me that I shouldn’t ask her dirty questions, because many patients misunderstand her and ask her dirty stuffs. She simply can’t allow such patients to visit her office. At any rate, this will be my last session, so I’m planning to ask her if she can do a huge favor for me, a happy ending, ha-ha-ha….”
When I arrived at Cancun Airport, Ramon was waiting for me with sanguine expectations. As soon as he saw me emerging form the gate, he bolted toward me, gave a big hug, and hailed with a delightful grin, “Nice to see you again, man. We should go straight to Fifth Avenue for celebrating on our reunion. A bunch of beautiful cunts are waiting for you there, as I’ve promised. Give me your suitcase. Let me carry it for you, let’s go, biatch!”
While we were driving to Fifth Avenue, he was chattering away with animation: “Hey bitch, first of all, let me congratulate on your first book. I’m really proud of you! I can’t wait for reading your manuscript. Thank you so much! Shogo, don’t worry anything about the future. You’ll find a publisher very soon, because you’ve written the book from your true feelings. It’s just a matter of time, for everyone will recognize your talent as soon as they lay their eyes on your book, for sure. And of course, it’s my duty as your pimp master to take care of your book for being available at all sex shops and bookshops here in Mexico, ha-ha-ha…. Anyway, I have good news for you. To tell the truth, I’ve already started working on it. I know a cunt who is working for a Mexican publisher as an editor. I’ve already contacted her. She told me that it’s crucial for you to register your work as soon as possible in order to protect it. And then we should send the first chapter of your book to her. She’ll read it and think what she can do for you.”
“Thanks, Ramon. I knew I can count on you always.”
Every time I see Ramon Garcia, some dramas will surely happen. It does not matter where he is being in; a drama is always waiting for him, with a deadly ambush, as if he could not live without it. It is impossible for anyone to spend a day with him without a drama. As soon as you are with him, a drama will inevitably happen within twenty-four hours as sure of as God’s sunrise. Every his single action is the preparation for a future drama without his knowing it. It does not matter whether he is sleeping; it does not matter whether he is eating tacos; it does not matter whether he is driving a car; it does not matter whether he is brushing his teeth; it does not matter whether he is taking a shower; it does not matter whether he is evacuating; it does not matter whether he is fornicating; and so on and so forth. The simple truth is that every his single action produces his impending dramas: cause and effect. There are no earthly explanations, for some people are just born in this way. Whether Ramon Garcia likes a drama or not, that does not matter to the world, since it is simply ineluctable for his survival. He just cannot escape from dramas. Even if he is in Alaska, universe will find him and fetch a new dram for him, as though universe said, “Human beings can survive without water for a week, but Ramon Garcia cannot survive without a drama; he can be perished into the thin air within forty-eight hours.” Being devoid of a dram is inconceivable for his existence. Now you can imagine how many dramas I have destined to witness for my sojourn in Playa Del Carmen. With that in mind, I shall continue the story….
He falls to pondering for a while and lets in, “You know, my friend, if the path of great wisdom and great foolishness run close together, then you’re walking them both with the same kind of fearless helplessness, never quite knowing which one you’re being on at any given time, and never quite caring. It seems to me that you are more interested in living a life that will describe rather explain you. I truly think you are the most honest and forthright person in whom I have the pleasure of knowing. And most importantly, you are a unique man who has entirely lived on the destiny which your creator has intended you for, and given you the courage to bear. Shogo, for the love of God, please go on following your compass toward the end, for I eagerly want to see what you’ll become in the future!”