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IMG_8438“Pay attention, brother, I haven’t finished it yet,” he continues, “the other horrible incident occurred while I was driving for a job interview. In my despair I was caught by a traffic jam, what a bad luck! You know how terrible Mexican traffic jam is – it’s unbelievable. Anyway, I couldn’t move due to the fucking traffic jam, and suddenly, my stomach got a familiar and detestable sensation. Can you imagine that I got UC attack in the middle of the traffic jam? I was so panicked, man! I couldn’t get off the car and couldn’t find any fucking bathroom. And it was too late. While I was panicky-stricken to find the way out, shit was shooting out like an avalanche. I couldn’t hold it; actually, it was impossible for a human being to hold it. I gathered all my super human strength to hold it and squeezed my ass with all my might, but the calamity of UC attack was ineluctable. And the worst part was that I surrender to the forthcoming disgrace with dismay, ah!”

“Ha-ha-ha…. Oh my God! What a humiliating blow!” I am guffawing. “You got UC attack in the middle of traffic jam? Heaven, you don’t say! It was helpless, man. What happened then? Did you go to the job interview?”

“Idiot!” he screams. “Are you out of your mind? How could I go to the job interview with shit on my pants? No, brother, I didn’t go to the stupid job interview. I called them and said I don’t want to take a fucking job anymore. Good-bye and good luck to the stupid job. With that, I hung up. I had to endure such an unpleasant feeling over two hours to get home to wash myself. Can you imagine that shit was in my pants for two hours? I opened all the windows to let the fresh air in, but it didn’t work. The smell was repulsive. My BMW was contaminated by my own caca, so to speak. It was abhorrent and humiliating!”

 

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