No Thank You Very Much!

He was suddenly standing up, “Shogo, let’s go to Kings Pub, I want to drink tonight.”

I was a little surprised because he had a job tomorrow; however, I accepted going there because I thought that he might want to spill something out from his chest, so I just said, “Let’s go!”

We were on the way to Kings Pub. It was a chilly night with gray clouds above us. While walking on the street, he suddenly asked, “Shogo, how about my cousin? She likes you very much. I guess more than that. She is in love with you. That’s why she always comes to you to talk. She is always straight. If she doesn’t like someone, she’ll say it right in one’s face. I’ve seen her expressing her feelings toward people many times. Indeed, she always asks about you. I know her very well, my friend.”

“What? Are you talking about the kooky vagina? She is in love with me, no thank you very much! Are you crazy? You know she is nuts, don’t you?”

He was laughing, “Of course, I know that vagina is loony, but you know, she has blonde hair, blue eyes, and isn’t tall. I think she is your type, ha-ha-ha….”

“Are you drunken already, man? Are you delusional? You think I care about the noisy dwarf? You think stupid Leticia has a chance to do something with me? I tell you, it’s nil. Never! Not on your life, man! Anyway, I like to talk with her and enjoy being with her sometimes, like once every three months.”

“Ha-ha-ha, I know, my friend. I understand what you mean. Sometimes she is okay, and I like her, but sometimes I don’t like her. You know, she always wants to get attention, that vagina. But she is your best friend, so what is wrong with her?”

“What is wrong with her? Everything. I don’t know why stupid Leticia always introduces me to her friends as her best friend. Besides, I have no idea how she got such a fanatical notion into her head in the first place. She always says, ‘Hello, my best,’ but I’m not her best; only she thinks I am her best, you know, how that vagina’s mind works, ha-ha-ha….”

He was laughing, “I know that stupid vagina. Anyway, you have to see her again soon because we have a Christmas party that is going to be held her sister’s house. Sorry, my friend. She’ll disturb you the whole night, ha-ha-ha….”

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